How to Sleep after waking up at Midnight

Yesterday I had to get up at 3pm since my father in law was arriving by train. We had to pick him up from the station and me and wife got ready quickly and went to the station. At the station there was some confusion due to which we spent around half an hour in finding him and then we got him home after that.

Once we got home I decided to go back to sleep as it was too early to start the day and usually when I am sleep deprived the day does not go of well with me. On getting to the bed initially I found that it is difficult to sleep back once you have to get up earlier. After few tossing and turning I suddenly found an effective way to get to sleep. Let me share that simple process below.

First of all lie down flat on your back with the hands to the side and relaxed. If you try to sleep sideways you would find it difficult to get back to sleep. I usually sleep sideways and find it easy to get to sleep in this position but when I have to wake up at night and again go to sleep sideways method is lesser effective for me. Close your eyes and move your eyeballs little upward. Try to relax the breathing and soon you should be able to see some random moving patterns in front of the eyes. Just observe them and soon you would be sleeping soundly.

I have found another technique to be useful also. In this technique I decide to meditate on the name of the deity I worship. For this I decide that I will slowly repeat the name of the deity around 100 times mentally and with each breath I meditate the name once. Once I start this usually I find myself in sleepy and eyelids become heavy very shortly and most of the times I am asleep before I reach the count of 100.

Important thing here is you should be relaxed and be pleasantly confident that you will be able to sleep with the technique. You can try this and see the results.

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Fear of Falling

Learning to skate is one of my 50 Goals for me. At the beginning of the year I included this as one of my goals for this year. I already had a pair of skates at my place and started practicing. I only put the skates on one leg and used the other leg to to push. I was afraid that I would fall down if I put on the skates on both the legs therefore I felt that it would be safer to put on the skate on only one leg. Another reason for practicing on one leg was I felt that it would give me the feel of skating without the risk and later I could move on to skating on both legs smoothly. How wrong was I.

However much ever I practiced on single leg, the feel is never the same as practicing with skates on both legs. Also it did not help me overcome the fear of falling down because I never fell down practicing on single leg. It happened for two weeks and then I lost interest. That was until last week.

Last week guests came over to our house to stay for couple of weeks. They also have small children and as is usual with most children they want to try out new things. They do not have the fear of failure or falling down as we elders have. Usually that fear is instilled by grown ups in the children. Some of the fears like teaching them to be safe from fire or electricity may be good for them but lot of others are not good for their growth.

Anyway to continue with the story, they started trying out the skates and on the second day I noticed that their nine year old daughter decided to try to skate on both legs. She took baby steps and was successful in covering a small distance without falling down. I was impressed with how quickly she was able to do that and main reason was she did not have the fear of falling. What I was reluctant to try even after two weeks, she decided to try on the second day itself. That is what innocence of a child can achieve.

This gave me hope and I immediately decided to give it a try. I put on the skates on both the legs and was able to cover a distance safely. I was thrilled. I tried again and decided to call my son to show this. My son came saw me trying to skate on both the legs. He was not impressed with the speed with which I was moving and gave me a good push on my back. I fell down on my back. Though it did not hurt much physically, my ego was hurt and got angry on him.

After I calmed down I realized that falling down was not that painful as I had assumed it to be. In fact it was good that I was pushed and I fell down. That incident removed my fear of falling. Now I am practicing skating and hope to gain sufficient skills in near future.

My Lessons
1. Likelihood of falling or failing is lesser that we assume.
2. Falling down is not as painful or disgraceful as we imagine it to be. Falling removes the fear and it is good for us in the learning process.

Go ahead and pursue your dreams. Falling down is part of the process to succeed after all stepping stone to success are the failures. Falling or failing helps us to lose our fears which stop us from growing.

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How to make Yogurt or Curd like Indian Sweet Shops

Unlike US or other European countries, Yogurt is not packaged and sold in India and many other Asian countries. You can get it fresh for the manufacturers, who are usually your neighborhood sweet shop owners.

Day before yesterday, I went to buy curd (yogurt) at a shop near my house. Somehow the yogurt at the shops is very well made and thickly set while when we make the curd at our home it is sour and more contains more fluid.

I asked the shopkeeper the secret to making great yogurt, and he gladly revealed the secret to me. I tried it at home and I was successful in making superb yogurt as you can see in the picture. It was firm and had creamy layer on the top. It tasted great and I made it again and again with the same process.

It is also lot cheaper than what you pay for while buying from the stores.

 Here is the recipe.

1. Use a glass containers. Earthen containers are also excellent option however they are difficult to find everywhere.
2. Use a flat bottom container instead of deep bottomed container. Baking tray is a good option.
3. Pour the milk in the container. In the summers use lukewarm milk and in the winters use hot milk.
4. Add four to five drops of curd from existing collection Yogurt at home, in the milk. Usually we make the mistake of adding too much of curd which make it too sour.
5. Keep the container aside and do not disturb for 10 hours or so. If you disturb the container too much yogurt will not be solid in nature.

Usually start the process in the night and keep it in refrigerator in the morning till you consume this home made yogurt.

 Try it and enjoy the fresh home made yogurt.

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Idolizing Others Will Take You Nowhere

Recently Sachin Tendulkar became the first batsman in the world to score 200 runs in a one day international match. Next day media went gaga over it. Most Indians are fans of Sachin Tendulkar and they were extremely happy. Lot of them must have spent hours reading and discussing the achievement though they might have see it live on TV earlier. What a waste of time and energy. Do not get me wrong. I am not against Sachin, I am against wasting time eulogizing our heroes. Wouldn't it be better to use that time to do something constructive?

It is good to appreciate an achiever but we should not be emotionally attached to the success or failure of that person. If that hero succeeds we are happy and if the hero is unsuccessful we are sad. For example some people will be happy if Sachin succeeds while India loses a match. Similarly most peoples' sentiments are attached to cricket team in India. If the Indian cricket team wins they are happy whereas if it loses they are sad and may skip their meals. At the same time very few people are upset that India is competing for the last position in the hockey world cup. The reason is they are not sentimentally attached to the Hockey Team.

Another example is obsession with film stars. Fans of a film star may become violent if you criticize their hero. Some fans have committed suicide on the death of their hero. Such a waste of life.

It is better to focus on your strength and work on it. No one deserves that kind of adulation and idolizing. If you admire the qualities then learn from them and use them for your betterment. For example we should learn from the power of concentration and amount of hard work Sachin puts in to produce the great performances instead of just watching him on TV and celebrating his success as if they are your own. It would be greater tribute to your hero if you put your efforts in developing yourself using the qualities which you may admire in him.

So go for some workout today or a yoga session or take some decision to invest wisely. Let us produce more great people and leaders instead of bunch of emotional fools.

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Stop being a Doormat

Do you feel that no one listens to you? Do you feel that people take you for granted by your friends and relatives? Do you feel that you are exploited at the work? Are you tired of people treating as their doormat?
There are people out there who mistake your sincerity and decency to meekness and try to take advantage. If you give in to them they become bolder and next time they are back to exploit you. These people are present everywhere as colleagues, bosses, relatives. Standing upto these situations is very important because, you can lose your self esteem very fast with these kind of people. There is no point in sulking privately. Stand up and face them. You are responsible for your situation and if you allow them to dictate you are giving the control of your destiny in the hands of others.

Here are few suggestions to follow if you want to come out of that situation.

1. Start Saying No
   Learn to say no to the task which you feel is not justified. Even if you are afraid, still say no. No one should be allowed to take you for granted. The people who are unreasonable while dealing with you are also aware of that, only thing is they are confident that they can bully you into doing it since you always allow that. Once you start saying No, and then say than whenever there is some unreasonable demand gradually you will earn respect and able to bring the situation into your favor.


2. Do Not Be Afraid of Loosing
   Many times we are afraid that if we say no, we will lose these friends or relatives and therefore cannot say no or continue to tolerate their nonsense. Remember that true friends or well wishing relatives will not like to hurt you. If they do that then tell them so and in case there is no improvement, it is better to separate with them. Life is too precious and short to tolerate wrong kind of people in your life.


3. Improve your Self Esteem
   Usually people who are treated as doormat are those who lack self esteem and it gets eroded further whenever bad things happen again and again. Start saying no which is mentioned in the point number 1. That is the first step. There are other steps which can be useful and mainly they are related so removing the fears related to social interactions. You can take baby steps to success. Here is an article on removing your fears.

It is your life and do not allow anyone to treat you shabbily. Once you take the first brave step, you will find that people will treat you more respectfully. Continue to take braver steps and you will find that other aspects of your life also starts improving magically and no one will treat you as a doormat again.

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Seek out Negative Response to Become Braver

There are various techniques to become brave. One of them is to seek out negative results. When you expect negative response in advance you loose the fear of rejection. When you loose the fear of rejection you start approaching a challenge in a braver manner without nervousness and as a paradox your chances of success increases.

When you start this, treat this as an experiment and try to observe the outcome instead of attaching yourself to the result. Detaching yourself from the results is what will increase the courage. Try out the following three experiments.

1. Ask for Lift
   Ask for lift from 10 motorists. If they stop then it is great but do not go with them. Tell them a destination 500 km away so that you can avoid them. Your aim is not to go but ask for lift. Keep asking for the lift from at least 10 persons.


2. Give Interviews
   Make a aim and attempt to give 10 interviews. Again your aim should not be selection rather the interaction with the interviewer. This will help you to face rejection and will be very helpful when you are really looking for a job.


3. Try selling to 10 People
   Get a new T-Shirt which should be nicely packed and approach 10 people in a crowded place and ask if they would buy the T-Shirt.

You can similarly think of other things to try out and then go out and do those. You will end up more courageous and enriched with newer experiences.

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How to Strategize for Success

In my last post I mentioned the importance for strategising for success. In this post focuses on how to strategize. As mentioned earlier, purpose of strategeizing is two fold. First it helps us to solve a problem and more importantly it helps us to get to the solution in a cheapest manner compared to the resources we use. When strategizing we aim to be effective instead of striving for perfection. We are then ready to compromise with achieving around 80% of the expected full value with the least investment.

Doing this in the long run, helps us have enough free time for fun while achieving more than average success rate in all the spheres where we work.

3 Good Ways to Strategize

1. Decide How much is important
   It is easier to focus on less. Do not commit the mistake of trying 100 percent of the area. Then you would not able to strategize. For these you need to take the following approach.
   First identify which part is absolutely essential to the task and without which essence of the task will be lost. Do not let it be more than 60% of the total task. Make sure that this portion is done perfectly. Then identify the tasks which are not as important as the first part but can give boost to the output with least amount of efforts. Do not let these to be more than 20% of the total task. Concentrate on this 80% of the task and finish it as fast as possible without losing focus.


2. Look For Help
   If you are going to start a task on which you have little knowledge, identifying the important portions mentioned in the point 1 may also be difficult. Also you may know what you need to do but do not know how to do that. For this best is to look for a person who has knowledge on the subject or google it. This will help you to eliminate the mistakes and wastage of time by avoiding the wrong paths. While you do that be aware that it is not guaranteed that the path suggested may be the best path. Think over the solution before you start. It is possible that once you have the insight you may be able to come up with a better solution.


3. Start working on the Work
   Once you cross the first two steps start to work on the work as soon as possible. You determination and energy is at their peak at the beginning and you should use that energy to quickly get over large portion of the task. This will give a boost to your chances of finishing the task. Most of the tasks which we do not ever start working on is due to the delay in starting it. If you eliminate this obstacle then chances of succeeding increases many folds.

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